Layer 8

Security is fundamentally about people, and everything we know about people is relevant to security. -- B. Schneier

Dell tiptoes into the 20th century.

So Dell has been getting a lot of well-deserved flack about its attempt to market to women with its mini Netbook.  They’ve claimed to have made some changes, but their page still reads as though you could roll up the Netbook and use it as a deodorant tampon.

If I were to rewrite it, it would look more like this:



1. Get organized: Sites like lifehacker.com give you tips on everything from organizing your home server room to planning your next OS upgrade.  Terrorize the guys in the co-op next door by cracking their lame-ass WEP keys.  Organize your VMs and your malware samples.

2. Get smarter: It’s easy to turn your netbook into a completely portable pirate stash. You can download all your torrents and take it offline when the FBI comes calling. 

3. Get moving:  Take your death metal everywhere you go, especially game nights on the office LAN. Some netbooks even offer an optional DVD drive if you’re not already streaming pr0n online. And if your netbook has an HDMI port, you can expand your screen by connecting your netbook to an external monitor or TV. Several minis have HD screens available as an upgrade!  (But we wouldn’t recommend it for viewing pr0n; nobody wants to see Ron Jeremy in HD.  Ew.)

4. Get more: Add storage to your netbook with memory cards or memory keys.  Pringles cans now supported!

5. Get up and travel: Your lightweight, packable netbook can transform your traveling experience, whether you’re teasing paranoid commuters on the train or hitting every security conference in the country. Use your netbook to vlog and blog about your Casa Fuente visits; collect extortion photos; store your rainbow tables; and even collect bread recipes.

Really, if they thought they needed to do something special to get women to buy more of their netbooks, all they had to do was show women doing the same things with them that men do.  If they really felt the need, they could offer the hardware in pink.  But pretending that women only use computers to travel, diet, update their Facebook page, and store their yoga poses is nothing short of incredible in this day and age.

Posted by shrdlu on Monday, May 18, 2009
(1) CommentsPermalink blogmarks Favicon del.icio.us Favicon Digg Favicon Fark Favicon Furl Favicon Google Bookmarks Favicon StumbleUpon Favicon Technorati Favicon TailRank Favicon

Comments

LonerVamp United States on 05/18  at  03:28 PM:

I saw that too, and cringed inside. I understand if you want to buy off an endorsement from Oprah as clout, but anything beyond that is just asking for trouble. I mean…really…can women not think for themselves in their technology decisions? Even my mom is passable these days!

Really, there is nothing inherently male in netbooks or computers in general, if you ask me. Hence there’s no need to specifically market to females.

It’s like getting a classic kid-friendly movie like Star Wars or Indiana Jones. Just freakin make it. If it’s good, the kids will like it more than if you set out specifically to make a kids movie (see the later incarnations of those franchises as examples).

Side note: My captcha word below just happens to be ‘62his’ ...hah!

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